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Share a laugh.

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛I have a confession to make. I like to see bickering. Bickering, or fight in some more serious cases, is fun. Bickering is good. Ego is good. No? I think they are excellent motivators.

What happened in Rolia got me to think and I had it all figured out – benchmark. We are all immigrants, and sadly, all have spent 20 even 30 years in learning English. We need a confirmation on this dedication to English learning and also take some comfort in thinking that those years are not wasted. But one question on everyone’s mind is: how good are we? Native speakers don’t bother to give us this information, so we have to benchmark against each other among ourselves, and that is where the trouble comes from.

Then I had a better idea.

I went to the Graigslist.com and found what I was looking for – a private tutor. The ad says : “Fix your accent. Native speaker. Give me three of your audio clips and 20 dollars and you will benefit for life.”
I was cheap and couldn't resist the temptation. I wired the guy 20 dollars, along with three reading clips of one of my favourite books. I gave it my best shot and it almost cost me whole day until my throat was sour and I nearly fell in love with my own voice. I attached files and hit “send” button. I was very happy, content and felt reasonably accomplished.

Shortly, an email came back. There were only two words: you suck.

Okay, this guy was good, I thought. I emailed back asking for more details and suggestions on how to improve my spoken English.

Shortly, an email came back. Still two words: you suck.

I was a little angry now. I wrote back saying I was expecting more because I paid 20 dollars.

Shortly, an email came back. This time, five words: that is why you suck.

I can’t say this is the first time that I have been duped, but what makes it so humiliating is that he makes it so easy. This idiot has underestimated me and he has no idea what he had done and the consequence that comes with it. He has no idea what will happen when he pisses off a Chinese.

I did one thing that all Chinese knew how to do – I went into the business myself. So, I registered a new email account, set up a money transfer method and put up an ad on the Graiglist.com and, voila, I was officially in business. My ad said: “Fix your accent. Native speaker. Give me three of your audio clips and you will benefit for life. For only 10 dollars!”更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 工作学习 / 外语学习 / Share a laugh.
    本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛I have a confession to make. I like to see bickering. Bickering, or fight in some more serious cases, is fun. Bickering is good. Ego is good. No? I think they are excellent motivators.

    What happened in Rolia got me to think and I had it all figured out – benchmark. We are all immigrants, and sadly, all have spent 20 even 30 years in learning English. We need a confirmation on this dedication to English learning and also take some comfort in thinking that those years are not wasted. But one question on everyone’s mind is: how good are we? Native speakers don’t bother to give us this information, so we have to benchmark against each other among ourselves, and that is where the trouble comes from.

    Then I had a better idea.

    I went to the Graigslist.com and found what I was looking for – a private tutor. The ad says : “Fix your accent. Native speaker. Give me three of your audio clips and 20 dollars and you will benefit for life.”
    I was cheap and couldn't resist the temptation. I wired the guy 20 dollars, along with three reading clips of one of my favourite books. I gave it my best shot and it almost cost me whole day until my throat was sour and I nearly fell in love with my own voice. I attached files and hit “send” button. I was very happy, content and felt reasonably accomplished.

    Shortly, an email came back. There were only two words: you suck.

    Okay, this guy was good, I thought. I emailed back asking for more details and suggestions on how to improve my spoken English.

    Shortly, an email came back. Still two words: you suck.

    I was a little angry now. I wrote back saying I was expecting more because I paid 20 dollars.

    Shortly, an email came back. This time, five words: that is why you suck.

    I can’t say this is the first time that I have been duped, but what makes it so humiliating is that he makes it so easy. This idiot has underestimated me and he has no idea what he had done and the consequence that comes with it. He has no idea what will happen when he pisses off a Chinese.

    I did one thing that all Chinese knew how to do – I went into the business myself. So, I registered a new email account, set up a money transfer method and put up an ad on the Graiglist.com and, voila, I was officially in business. My ad said: “Fix your accent. Native speaker. Give me three of your audio clips and you will benefit for life. For only 10 dollars!”更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • You are smarter. You don't cheat yourself to make yourself believe that you are better than the rest but in fact you are probably not, or not at all.
      Don't make yourself a fool, never.
      • 哎呀呀。。。。
        • Would you like some Dulion Estate Bakery Lemon Straws? Excellent taste.
    • 内容轻松诙谐,文笔如行云流水。
      • 酱油哥已经完全不是原来的酱油哥了。
        • Somewhat agree / disagree
        • 个人感觉不谢兄有讲故事的天赋,加上其深厚的英文功底,当个作家对他不是难事。
        • 正如一句歌词,我还是原来的我。
        • 看过你的心态系列,你的文笔也相当好,就是文法没有不谢严谨,词汇量也相对少点。
          • Glad to see that " 酱油哥已经完全不是原来的酱油哥了。"
            • 军功章里,有你的一大半,也有我的一小半。。。
              • 没我的事儿啊。 你和不谢哥。
    • ça fait plaisir
    • hehe, My ad said “Fix your accent. Native speaker. Give me three of your audio clips and you will benefit for life. For only 5 dollars!” :)
      • 5 dollars? I learn English from Jane Austen and JacK London. It is free.
        • 还是找杰瑞吧, 你会学的比那谁还棒.
          • 没钱, 太贵,不去。
            • 一分价钱一分货啊, 看人家那啥哥, 多风光啊.
              • 又不能当饭吃。 真是的。
                • 那, 是一种感觉, 自己的. Build self confidence ...rapidly improve self confidence...
                  • That's very true. So what do I need?
                    • 跟着感觉走... 象那哥学习...
                      • 那哥是谁?
                      • 学啥啊? 送他一句话: “骄傲使人落后”
        • 有这么好的人?他们在多伦多么?
          • what do you think?
            • 好像是便宜没好货.
          • 不是都告诉你了,一个在得州奥斯汀,另一个在英国伦敦。
            • 怎么不屏蔽了?
              • 我还纳闷呢,怎么刚回的帖就沉了,满屏幕找也找不到。一搜才知道,原来是不小心掉进来了。
                • 马儿啊, 你慢些跑!
                  • 跑慢了被溅一身口水。
                    • 有益健康
            • 谢马网友。可惜太远了。stress mm 莫非上的函授?
              • 说点正经的吧。
                • 说正经的你又不相信。你的英语比酱油哥还好,不需要提高了。
                  • 是啊。 My broken English is much better than his standard English, because it is easy to understand. I do not have difficult words in my sentence. Honestly, I do not even know any difficult words.
            • Thanks PonyPlus. You've got a great sense of humor.